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Kaleb Weis Wants to Burn State Flag: HB 1069 Imposes Impractical State Seal Rules

Republican Kaleb Weis ran for District 2 House on grand promises of cutting waste from state government (because, obviously, he believes his fellow Republicans who have run this state for forty years have thrown fiscal restraint out the window) and reversing the erosion of “the very core values of our families.”

To save South Dakota from fiscal and moral collapse, rookie Representative Kaleb Weis (R-2/Aberdeen) offers his first bill, House Bill 1069, which would slightly toughen our laws on use of the state seal.

The “significant” provisions of HB 1069 seek the following vital reforms:

  1. Require every representation of the state seal, including those an inch across or smaller, to include every constitutionally specified detail of the seal, especially the theocratic motto, “Under God the People Rule.”
  2. Extend the deadline for every state agency to comply with this mandate from July 1, 2018 (oopsies!) to January 1, 2020.
  3. Strike the grandfather clause allowing continued use of seals existing prior to July 1, 2018.

We addressed this silliness last year, when legislators exerted themselves to protect the state seal from misrepresentation. HB 1069 shows that we should be working to protect residents of District 2 from misrepresentation.

Provision 1, striking the one-inch rule, shows that our man Kaleb wasn’t paying attention during last year’s state seal debate. Sponsors of last year’s state-seal-protection bill added that one-inch exemption when they realized an all-sizes mandate like Kaleb’s would have made illegal pretty much every letterhead or lapel pin with coin-sized replicas of the seal, which cannot practically represent all of the elements of the seal.

Provision 2 shows that last year’s legislators imposed a mandate that state agencies could not practically meet. I can only assume that Kaleb has requested a fiscal note so that this time, legislators know exactly how much it will cost every agency to order new letterhead and plaques and other decorations, and Kaleb can attach a special appropriation to his bill to make sure agencies can pay for his bold mandate. He can then argue that we can take the savings from all the waste he’s cutting (wait, where’s that bill again?) to buy new seals for every agency!

CAH with original SD flag, 2016
Kaleb Weis would burn this flag!

Provision 3 shows Kaleb’s contempt for the past. Remember that beautiful original state flag so proudly displayed in the Secretary of State’s office? That bold reminder of our origins and our ability to catch corrupt government workers would have to go in the drawer, if not the burn barrel, since its version of the state seal does not comply exactly with the specifications of Article 21 Section 1.

To frost his density, Kaleb also can’t do grammar:

These requirements do This requirements does not infringe upon or limit any artistic or satirical use of the seal [HB 1069, as posted 2019.01.23].

This requirements does not make grammatical sense. HB 1069 do not make practical sense. Kaleb not know write smart bill; Kaleb take puff bill, try look busy, no do big things. 

18 Comments

  1. grudgenutz 2019-01-25

    Like diarrhea, poop keep coming out moron legislature crevices, headed for SoDak Criminal Code. No can understand why anyone call them wacky.

  2. Kal Lis 2019-01-25

    The legislature is going to debate protecting the state seal wen

    1. Nursing homes are closing.
    2. Small towns are losing their grocery stores.
    3. Roads and bridges.
    4. Farm economy hurt by tariffs.
    5. Federal workers in South Dakota are missing paychecks. (As an aside, has any news outlet covered the numbers of South Dakota workers going without paychecks and the numbers of contractors who will not get back pay?)

    I’ll grant that the legislature may not be able to solve these problems completely. Right now, a 20% solution or a little old fashioned jawboning to provide some temporary relief would be helpful. Discussions about the state seal are useless.

    I’m getting nostalgic for debates about state desserts or state insects or state toilet paper.

  3. Nick Nemec 2019-01-25

    This bill is a teething ring for the new legislators to cut their teeth on while they learn the legislative process. Maybe we really do need a mandated separate civics class.

  4. mike from iowa 2019-01-25

    Whatever became of the ‘original’ stat flag’s excellent adventure to DC by way of theft? Curious iowan wonders who and how many were let off the hook….again.

  5. Cory Allen Heidelberger Post author | 2019-01-25

    Teething ring—perfect, Nick!

    Anyone who needs a teething ring to practice being a legislator is not qualified to be a legislator. Citizens deserve representatives who are ready to advocate for them on serious issues on Day 1.

  6. grudgenutz 2019-01-25

    These folks are ready to go on Day 41.

  7. Rorschach 2019-01-25

    No more state seal lapel pins. Woo hoo!

  8. Cory Allen Heidelberger Post author | 2019-01-25

    We should defer Kaleb Weis and his ilk to the 41st day.

    Kal Lis, your critique is apt. Kaleb Weis himself spoke of far more important issues that needed to be solved, but he toddles out with this trivial and ungrammatical bill. (I feel my oratory judging paradigm coming on.)

  9. Eve Fisher 2019-01-25

    Nice to know there is a never ending stream of idiot bills to waste their time and our money on.

  10. Debbo 2019-01-25

    So the lege has taken time to attack South Dakotans who are not straight white males, argued over the state seal, are making guns even easier to have and transport, tried to get into women’s uteri again, wanted to issue civics stickers, resolve to support the wall Lying Lunatic just caved on, etc.

    I don’t think it’s necessary to add to this ignominious list. 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

  11. Kal Lis 2019-01-25

    Cory,

    I don’t want to get sidetracked with all inside debate world points, but I’m not sure there are enough problems with the state seal for a good high school orator to find 5 or 6 minutes worth of problems before giving the perfunctory 3 step solution.

  12. grudznick 2019-01-25

    The state toilet paper is whatever brand is installed in the Rep. Nelson Memorial Stall, with the $120,000 bronze plaque the legislatures paid to place upon the swinging door, in the remodeled bathrooms next to the gold plated drinking fountains. Look in the real media or search the information the legislatures put on the internets, these are all facts. Except the state toilet paper part. That will be a law bill this year.

  13. mike from iowa 2019-01-26

    South Dakota toilet paper is the embarrassingly red corn cob.

  14. mike from iowa 2019-01-26

    Made by Loathesome Hybrids embarrassingly red corn cob company.

  15. Porter Lansing 2019-01-26

    grudznick uses only old brown grocery sacks for toilet paper. That explains his outlook on new things and ideas. My goats, however only use the toilet paper voted number one in the world by the New York Times product rating service WIRECUTTER. Cottonelle.
    https://thewirecutter.com/reviews/the-best-toilet-paper/

  16. Cory Allen Heidelberger Post author | 2019-01-26

    Kal Lis, I’ve seen some kids who would try, just for the intellectual challenge of puffing nothing into something. Of course, the kids I have in mind would then proceed to polish that empty air into perfect, ironically gripping delivery that would snow-job two out of three judges (I’m judge #3). Alas, Weis won’t even treat us to a great blizzard of superior speech-making. He’ll just stammer about and wait for his R colleagues to mindlessly vote Aye so he can win his GOP points.

  17. Kal Lis 2019-01-26

    Cory,

    Your point makes me wonder is Weis wouldn’t benefit for having a couple of kids who specialize in Informative Speaking coach him on how to properly use visual aids as he waxes on about nothing.

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