7% of American adults are shacking up, says the Census Bureau.
A new report indicates that the number of unmarried cohabitators has tripled since the 1990s, but the Census notes that it changed how it counts such couples in 2007, so compare with caution.
However, the Census identifies some interesting statistics about our surging population of couples bound by their own fidelty rather than any legal oath (hey, isn’t that an expression of Libertarianism?):
In 1996, only 2% of partners in cohabiting households were ages 65 or older; by 2017, that had tripled to 6 percent.
…A higher proportion of unmarried partners identified as Hispanic in 2017 (16%) than in 1996 (11%).
Partners in interracial relationships increased from 6% to 10% of all cohabiters during this same period.
…In 1996, 16% of unmarried partners had a bachelor’s degree or higher compared to 28% in 2017.
Unmarried partners now also earn more on average. The proportion making less than $30,000 annually (in 2017 dollars) dipped from 64% in 1996 to 53% in 2017 [Benjamin Gurrentz, “Cohabitating Partners Older, More Racially Diverse, More Educated, Higher Earners,” U.S. Census Bureau, 2019.09.23].
The same report notes that Americans living with official spouses still make up the majority of our adult population, though that percentage has declined from 70.3% in 1967 to 51.2% last year.
11.1% of American adults live at home with a parent, just about the average living-with-the-folks rate over the last 51 years. 11.8% of American adults live with other relatives. 3.9% live with unrelated roommates.
I don’t care to stoke any culture war. I don’t need other people’s living arrangements to affirm my chosen living arrangements. My marriage will remain just as happy regardless of whether married people constitute a majority or a minority in my community. But if you think traditional marriage is natural and normative, I invite you to consider which might be harmful to social and emotional health: 19.1 million American adults living with lovers they don’t marry, or 35.7 million American adults living all by their lonesome? (The percentage of American adults living alone has increased from 7.6% in 1967 to 14.3% last year.)
Remember Charles Kuralt and his poem about “P0SSLQ”?
“Will you be my Posslq (pronounced passel cue)…………..
It stands for People of Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters. I believe it was a question on the 2010 census.
Indeed, Mr. H, you make one of your good points here. People alone are sadder and more ugly. It does make one wonder how things are going in Pringle, though, dunnit?
Cory, you made an assumption here that may not be true. “35.7 million American adults living all by their lonesome?”
I think I’ve seen studies showing number of cohabitants is not a guaranteed indicator of one’s state of loneliness or not. With the rates of various kinds of violence and abuse within cohabiting groups, it’s not surprising to me that the number of people living singly has increased.
I’m guessing that the increase in the number of partners cohabiting without marriage might be due in some part to the fact that many states have made the legal aspects of shared living easier to accomplish. I think in part that came about for the benefit of LBTG people before marriage for all was legal.
The changes in “family forms” is very interesting. I have friends with advanced degrees and solid middle class incomes who are choosing cohabitation with some legal adjustments, like co-ownership of the home, next of kin, adoption of children not progeny of one partner, joint bank accounts, etc.
Debbo, the 35.7M is not an assumption; it comes straight from the spreadsheet linked at the top of the Census article, under the heading “Living Alone.”
But “lonesome” versus “alone” is an assumption worth picking apart. Indeed, there is a difference between being alone and being lonesome. I know this personally: I enjoy solitude. I enjoy running with my dog, but I usually run and always bike alone, and when I do, I almost never feel lonely and pine for company.
At work, I can have just as satisfying a day if I spend all eight hours alone in my office banging away at projects as if I spend the entire day in productive conversations with colleagues.
Just as being alone ≠ being lonely, being in the presence of another ≠ companionship. Being with other people can raise or lower one’s spirits, depending on how one relates to one’s companions.
But there are still a lot of people out there that assume that an adult living alone is suffering from some affliction that needs to be cured by a ringed roommate of the opposite sex.
When I see two beautiful gay men living together here in MN I see love and happiness,and I feel happiness for them also. I don’t think that’s wrong like so many South Dakotans do.
I Still believe in marriage, I just don’t think it works for a lot of people. Cohabitate with whoever you want, love is love. Why don’t you find a man, Grud? You might be happier since you’re ‘alone and ugly’.
There are people who are content With living alone , especially if they’ve been through a bad divorce. The independence of living alone, being able to play the field,or focusing on quality friendships that are not of the superficial type can all be rewards to living the single lifestyle. I agree loneliness is a problem today, but there are plenty of marriages that are unhappy and filled with loneliness.
So learn to be vulnerable and don’t rush into a marriage just to be married.